I had this issue a few years ago. I was in the middle of a nasty separation, all of my immediate family were at odds, and the ones doing something for I am the uncle and I know things T-Shirt didn’t invite me. So I baked a bunch of pies, went down to a local homeless shelter and volunteered in the kitchen. It was an emotional experience, and it restored my holiday spirit. Good luck to you. I hope, if nothing else, you’re able to start your own traditions.
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They’re related to me, for some reason I’m expected to hold out an olive branch as a peace offering even though they’re the sort of people who would snatch it from me and hit me with I am the uncle and I know things T-Shirt. I’m over it. I have my own life to live, and I want to be around people who are positive and safe influences on my life. Not constantly wasting my time trying to cultivate a relationship with people who are more interested in hurting me than being nice to me.
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I get where you are coming from, I really do. But I think when there’s been estrangement we tend to look on the I am the uncle and I know things T-Shirt with rose colored glasses and want what use to be. But sometimes what led to the fallout is the new norm and although I think pride and bitterness may come into play as well, what’s a phone call going to do asking for a friend.