The kids these places hire aren’t much smarter than the cows that went into the meat grinder with their eyes wide open 70 Years Of Being Awesome, Funny 70th Birthday Gift, 70 Years Old T-Shirt . Things came to a head one weekend in July when the heat was intense and Shannon wanted me to put the AC unit in one of the windows. My apartment is on the tenth floor of the biggest corpse cock of an apartment building. One of those places that still have those old-timey radiators. The windows weren’t quite what they used to be back in 1912. I had all of ‘em open so the place could breathe and I was trying to get Shannon’s obscenely bulky and retro AC into the most stable window. Note that I didn’t say stable. Just most stable. I think a hare-lip baby gets a better grip on a titty than this window’s got a grip on that damn AC.
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All the while I’m doing this, Shannon is standing over me the way a child does over an anthill with a magnifying glass, letting me know how hot 70 Years Of Being Awesome, Funny 70th Birthday Gift, 70 Years Old T-Shirt it was in the apartment and that I’ve waited to do this at the last minute when the place feels like the interior of the devil’s thorny anus and it’s all another certified paper in the stack of evidence that I don’t really love her. I didn’t quite agree with her. As soon as the window had a feather’s grip on the AC, I stood to face Shannon and artfully convey my own thoughts.