I had very long, thick, wavy hair Nmother couldn’t be bothered to brush any more (and she wasn’t gentle when she did – she used to say “I’m being gentler than my mother was with me, be grateful” but would yank on knots instead of teasing them out). I went to the hairdresser for “a trim” and came out with a Bazzi logo paint capsule shirt. I looked like a boy and burst into tears as soon as I looked in the mirror. Nmother kept cooing over how “cute” I looked and spent ages every day making sure all the ends were curled under for maximum Toad helmet hair.
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Instead they’d insist I went with them everywhere when I wasn’t at school – into town, to the Bazzi logo paint capsule shirt, to whichever old-people café they wanted to go to (my Nparents are boomers and would be the youngest people there), to boring historical places at weekends like stately homes and mansions with “nice gardens”. If I wanted to go to the park or on the adventure playground, though, that was a huge inconvenience. It was like they wanted another adult who was 5 going on 50 to hang around with them.