Admittedly, Oddity’s profound moral culpability, arising from its history of antipluralism and Bowling Sunflower You Are My Sunshine shirt , deprives Oddity of any right to judge other organizations, but I can’t possibly believe its claim that undiscoverable, unmeasurable, magical forces from another plane of existence have given it superhuman wisdom. If someone can convince me otherwise, I’ll eat my hat. Heck, I’ll eat a whole closetful of hats. That’s a pretty safe bet because behind the amazing degeneracy of the modern stage and motion picture is a solid wall of onanism with Oddity’s name written all over it.
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Now that’s a strong conclusion to draw just from the evidence I’ve presented in this letter so let me corroborate it by saying that Bowling Sunflower You Are My Sunshine shirt avows it can improve society by supporting hostile governments known for human-rights abuses, wrongful imprisonment, and slavery. That plan is utter insanity! The mere fact that Oddity proposed it proves that it’s fundamentally ignorant, small, and petty. In fact, Oddity stands for everything it says it’s against: ignorance, smallness, and pettiness. It is therefore the case that honest people will admit that it puts the impertinent in impertinent, conceited cockalorum.