I am so sorry that you went through that. I don’t know the pain that you are going through but I know that is beyond anything. I do hope that you do realize that she is in a better place, smiling down on you. Know that she loves and Funny Frog With Suspenders And Gun Dont Ever Put Me In A Situation shirt. Take some time to heal. I hope that you come to the realization that she loves you and that she cares about you so much. Hopefully, you live your life for her and you do things for you and your son in her honor. A way to respect her life and what she has given you. A child that she wants you to love and care about.
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I don’t know if that would help or if it is just super dumb or even misplaced.. have you thought about the fact that, between all the days she could’ve left this Earth, past or Funny Frog With Suspenders And Gun Dont Ever Put Me In A Situation shirt, this was probably the happiest for her. Her first child, your first child. I’m pretty sure she was in total bliss holding her son for the first time. Of course that is also the most tragic day for others around her… I don’t believe in afterlife, I don’t say it doesn’t exist, I just don’t want to acknowledge the existence of something without proof, but if it indeed exists… She probably went up there or wherever that is with the best last memories, and all of that solely because i of you two, as lovers, as parents.