She’s triangulating you. She’s trying to cut other people out of the conversation by calling you on the down low Im A Dad And An Electrician Nothing Scares Me shirt , and manipulating you. Stop answering the phone. I’d go so far as to suggest reply to everything with your soon to be hubs standing right there and by text. Use “we” language instead of “i” to make it clear she can’t come between you two. Let fil know she called you behind his back and asked not to tell him. You will not participate in this behavior. If she brings up her parents again, ask if they are paying for THIS wedding. If not, its irrelevant. Stop bringing it up. Or you could act like she’s offering to pay for your entire wedding, which i think might be hilarious… but im not sure if that idea will get be in trouble here. Either way she sucks and i hope you have a lovely wedding YOUR WAY!
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Drop the rope with her. Stop talking to her. All contact should be your FDH. Be the greyest grey rock you can be. Discussion with her is stressful and useless Im A Dad And An Electrician Nothing Scares Me shirt , as she only hears what she WANTS to hear. Never accept even a nickel from her. Whenever you make plans including her, make sure they are complete, and DO NOT discuss them with her. She only needs date and time. Give her nothing to try to manipulate and change. Methinks she wants only POWER and CONTROL. Drop the rope.